


Sing for you

by bearhyuk



Category: K-pop, VIXX
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Bad Writing, Blind Date, Fluff and Crack, Lawyer, M/M, Ridiculous, Slice of Life, at least i hope so, it's actually fun, not a song fic, read to find out who Jaehwan is lmao
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-20
Updated: 2017-10-31
Packaged: 2019-01-20 09:56:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,918
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12430365
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bearhyuk/pseuds/bearhyuk
Summary: If Taekwoon has to describe his whole life up to this point with a word, that'd be "uneventful". He plans things ahead and follows accordingly to avoid mistakes and makes the best out of the time he has, but everything changes on a particularly strange day he decides to get lost in a pair of eyes that twinkles like a starlit night sky.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm back with another ridiculous piece of... something lol >_< I'll update the next chapter very soon so please stick around!

“Yes, mom. I’ll make sure to go”

“Yes, yes. Don’t worry”

“I know. I’m hanging up now. See you later”

Taekwoon sighs deeply after pressing the button to end the call. Long day, huh. Everyone has that kind of day, where nothing ever goes right, and Taekwoon swears he could already sense it when he woke up to the fact that he overslept and had barely half an hour left - to wash up, dress up and somehow magically transport to his company before an important meeting starts. He must have done some incredibly good deeds in his previous life because a miracle happened, as he managed to arrive on time. However life always proves to have the ability to turn even worse than what we consider **_worst_** – someone tripped and spilled burning hot coffee into his white, newly washed shirt; being squeezed till near death and getting his feet stepped on in the elevator was quite up there too, on the list of things that made today a particularly unbearable one, and receiving this call from his mom complaining, nagging him about marriage and peer pressuring him into going to a blind date is nothing but a cherry on top.

This is not the first time, though, because Taekwoon is nearly 30 and even though he thinks he’s at the perfect age to completely focus on developing his career, his mom doesn’t quite agree. He understands her concerns, as every parents ever always wish for their children’s happiness plus one thing that although she doesn’t speak aloud, Taekwoon knows she’s worried and insecure about. It’s the thing that he had been hiding for years on end only to accidentally spilled out during a rather heated conversation with his mom about marriage when he came home last year for holiday – _“I don’t even find women attractive”_. She doesn’t need to ever know that he’s gay, and even if she will find out one day anyway, it’s definitely not today.

Since then, his mom has been forcing him to meaningless blind dates. He went to some at first, but after that he lies on the most ridiculous excuses to get out of them, because it’s awkward, tiring and what even is the point anyway? However, she sounded desperate this time and when she started sobbing into the phone, Teakwoon knew he had no choice this time. He sighs again, thinking of getting it over as fast as he can, then after that he’d at least be able to be safe from his mom’s dreadful nags for quite a long time later.

That’s why here he is, after having to make up an excuse of his dog being sick to get out of work earlier than normal – 3PM, in the middle of this lovely café with his damned mood, waiting for a supposedly _out-of-this-world pretty and smart and humorous lady I swear to God you’d like her if you at least give it a try_ as his mom said. He looks at his watch impatiently, as if staring at it would make time pass any faster. Taekwoon makes a habit of arriving early to every appointments he needs to attend, that’s why it’s even more of an odd for him to almost be late to work today. He doesn’t look up from it for a while, not even when the waiter brings him his coffee with a light “enjoy” at the end, not until he hears someone takes a seat opposite from him and be absolutely not so subtle and gentle about it.

Not that much of a lady as his mom declared, he thinks.

“Hello”

…And that’s definitely not a lady. _Not a woman_. Taekwoon doesn’t reply as he takes time to recall if he accidentally missed anything about this blind date as his mom was bailing into the phone earlier. Only when he’s pretty sure he didn’t hear anything wrong or at least his mom didn’t mention anything about _A MAN WEARING A FACE MASK_ he was going to meet, that Taekwoon lets out a very gentle “Sorry but I think you got the wrong person” directing at the stranger.

“I’m pretty sure I didn’t”, the guy takes off the mask covering the low half of his face, smiles and somehow the fact that his eyes are twinkling like thousands stars lit them up inside so prettily bothers Taekwoon more than he’d admit, “Are you Mr. Jung Taekwoon?”

“I am”

“Then I’m not mistaken. You sure are a hot one, sir”

“What the fuck?”

Taekwoon doesn’t ever swear, or at least he doesn’t remember the last time he said such word, but he has every rights to forgive himself this time, because honestly _what the god damn fuck?_ He’s so annoyed as thousands of questions pop up in his mind, who is this random guy, why does he know his name, and what’s with that hot thingy… and that guy’s laughter ringing out loud and echoing in the spacious room definitely doesn’t help.

“Such a surprising choice of word you made there, lawyer-nim”, he stops laughing for a moment, “but since you’re here for a blind date anyway, wouldn’t a surprise like this make things more fun?”

“I really have no idea what is going on and definitely not interested in whatever that is, so please excuse me as I have more urgent things to take care of”

He said as he rolls his eyes, thinking that it’s actually not a bad thing that his blind date is ruined, if that means he can go home now to work on the new case that he was assigned to take today. Being a lawyer is not such an easy thing as a walk in the park, and he certainly doesn’t have time sitting here, listening to this ridiculous troll blabbering some bullshit thinking he’s interesting or something. Taekwoon calls the waiter, planning to pay for both of their drinks before leaving.

“You’re so not fun”, the guy pouts a little and looks down to his hands, seemingly to be genuinely disappointed because Taekwoon isn’t playing along with his little game

“Or you’re just weird”

“Aren’t you curious?”, the guy looks up and his eyes are slightly hidden behind a thin layer of light brown hair, a little too long brushing just over his brows and cheeks tinted pink, “that I know who you are, and that you’re here for the blind date? What if I’m actually the person you were set up to meet?”

“I’m pretty sure you’re not. So no, though I do feel weird about you knowing who I am, I don’t have time for any of this”, Taekwoon firmly says and stands up from where he is, however it seems like the stranger has no intention of letting him go that easy, because just when Taekwoon walks past him, he grabs his wrist with a stubborn hold and starts giggling like an actual mad person.

“Taekwoon hyung, I know it’s been a bad day for you so how about just going with the flow and enjoy the _blind_ factor of this supposedly blind date?”

When Taekwoon looks down – because the guy is still sitting where he is, he sees those twinkling stars again, blinking at him in a super annoying and mischievous way but somehow it strangely stirs up his curiosity.

“Who are you?”

“Shouldn’t you find it out yourself? I’m sure you will have the answer if we take time to slowly get to know each other”, the guy smiles, and not until then does Taekwoon notice his plump lips that blossom so prettily like dying rose petals, and the delicate nose bridge makes his side profile looks elegant, strangely drawing people in. He takes the chance to look at the guy properly, he’s wearing something rather too casual for a blind date – if he was actually the person Taekwoon supposed to meet as he claimed – an oversized red hoodie which is a bit too big, sleeves long enough to cover the guy’s hands, tight fitting black jeans ripped thighs down, plus a backpack that makes him doesn’t look a day over twenty.

“What do you want from me?”

“Your time”, he doesn’t smile anymore, but his eyes still do, “a tiny part of it”.

Taekwoon has never been a spontaneous kind of guy. He does everything according to a previously, carefully calculated plan so that every single second of his time doesn’t go to waste, that’s why it’s scary how he finds himself actually starting to consider giving in to the ambiguous _invitation_ of sort, coming from a complete stranger that just happens to know who he is, with an exceptionally bright pair of eyes.

“Taekwoon hyung~”

As if it’s not freaky enough already, the guy starts to speak in an incredibly nasally and pitched voice that is supposed to be _cute_ , Taekwoon guesses, while still using both of his hands to hold his wrist like a child holding on to its favorite toy stubbornly.

Taekwoon sighs.

“You have 2 hours”, he decides to not think anymore, “I still have work tomorrow”.

He plans things ahead and follows accordingly to avoid mistakes and to make the most of the time he has, but fuck it, this day can’t get any weirder anyway. Maybe this is an escape that he needs, and getting lost in a complete stranger’s pair of starlit eyes doesn’t sound that bad. Taekwoon thinks, maybe he just makes a wrong decision risking his own life because heck, this could be a serial killer, why else would he wear face mask besides the purpose to hide from the cops or something – just an exceptionally attractive one, but by the time he realizes that he should be cautious, he’s already sucked in too deep by the thrill of this whole deal.

.

“That was really scary, don’t you think? I almost cried up there!”

And for the fact that he thought he was being scammed into some dark business, even imagined being taken to weird places and being murdered – which is not that unreasonable considering how the guy wears face mask the whole time, Taekwoon could never think there’d be one day he ends up in the middle of _a theme park_ , at 5PM in the afternoon, on a work day on top of that. What makes it worse, is the fact that he has a cat ears headband on his head while he’s wearing black suit and white shirt, the _overly serious and makes you look 10 years older_ outfit– as his best friend Hakyeon said, even though Taekwoon thinks they make him look mature and confident, holding a cotton candy on his hand and walking around.

The guy – Jaehwan, now Taekwoon knows his name and only that because the brat refuses to tell him anything more than that about him, still can’t stop talking about the roller coaster ride they just got off, about how scary it was but it was stress-relieving anyway. It was indeed scary, Taekwoon thinks, judging by the way Jaehwan leaned his whole body on him, holding his arm for dear life while screaming thousands octaves – or something, Taekwoon doesn’t know much about music, but he thought he’d lose his hearing by the end of the ride.

So now besides the fact that he knows Jaehwan is… Jaehwan, after a few more scary rides mostly just about making people dizzy and want to throw up, he also knows that the guy is a scaredy cat with an amazing vocal chords. It’s starting to get dark, and as the evening gets deepen more people come here, assumingly for the famous ferris wheel of this park that lets people see the whole city from above, which is pretty romantic for stereotypically young people in love.

After getting off the last ride, Jaehwan wears his mask again. They walk side by side in silence, until they find a wooden bench and decide to sit down to rest a bit, because Taekwoon doesn’t remember the last time he walked this much and Jaehwan is drained from screaming too much, starting to feel dizzy. Jaehwan is humming a familiar melody and flapping his too-long sleeves in an impossibly more childish way, and Taekwoon doesn’t complain.

“You look so cute with the cat ears and the cotton candy”, Jaehwan’s laugh pulls him back to reality, and he doesn’t know what is more annoying, the fact that he’s wearing this embarrassing thing because he unconsciously agreed to do everything Jaehwan’d ask, or the fact that Jaehwan is also wearing a pair of cat ears, just in different color, and Taekwoon actually finds that cute. Just a little. Cute.  

“You scream extremely loud”, he says without making any expression, avoiding Jaehwan’s eyes, “you could be a singer with that kind of throat”

“You really think so?”, Jaehwan is smiling and Taekwoon knows that even though he can’t see it when Jaehwan is wearing a mask covering half of his face from his nose to his chin, because he also finds out one more thing about this guy – that is when he smiles, not only his full lips part and it reflects in his eyes, but also in the way he sounds when he talks like a bird chirping happily.

“You can ask me, you know”

Jaehwan pulls down his mask to eat the cotton candy that he made Taekwoon held for the whole time they were walking around. Taekwoon steals some, but it’s too sweet for him.

“Ask what?”

“About me. For example why I wear mask all the time.”

“Does that matter?”

Jaehwan giggles, maybe because totally contrasting to how Taekwoon was lowkey angry and turned him down at first and be cautious and all, he’s now losing the curiosity knowing Jaehwan doesn’t have the purpose to kill him or anything like that, or at least he’s acting so.

_“Oh my god”_

_“Gosh, is that really him?”_

_“No way, how would he…”_

_“Oh my god is that…”_

_“Is he…”_

_“No way…”_

_“Is that his manager???”_

_“It’s really him!”_

Just then, Taekwoon starts to notice that people are gradually stopping and gathering around them, and whispering not so subtly to each other. He at first thinks they were just curious about a couple of guy over 6 foot wearing cat ears and eating cotton candy, which was only bearable for him because when they came there was barely anyone here, it’s a work day afterall, but when Jaehwan curses in a low voice, “Damn it I got caught” and pulls him up from where he is sitting to walk away, Taekwoon realizes there might be some fishy things happening.

And when he hears some extremely high pitched female screaming behind them going _“KEN OPPAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!”_ plus Jaehwan is now running while holding his wrist towards the parking area, he now knows for sure that there’s definitely something fishy- no, _horrible_ happening.

.

“That was close”

Jaehwan speaks while panting helplessly after they got into Taekwoon’s car, sweat shining on his forehead that is now revealed because he runs his hand through his hair and swipe up a messy spike.

“For the love of God who the fucking fuck are you???”

Taekwoon almost screams because Jaehwan bursts out laughing incredibly loudly startles him. Jaehwan pulls out his phone from his pocket and types down something before giving it to Taekwoon to read.

_“KEN, born **Lee Jaehwan** on April 6 th 1992, is a singer, songwriter from South Korea…”_

“Now you know why I wear mask all the time”, he smiles again with that mischievous smile that Taekwoon hates so much.

Taekwoon feels like crying for the first time in his life.


	2. Chapter 2

 

“So”, Taekwoon needs a huge gulp of wine to continue, “you’re saying that you’re a celebrity, and you’re… running away?”

Jaehwan nods instead of giving an answer, he looks down to his feet and becomes unusually silent like a puppy being scolded, and Taekwoon can’t remember how many times he’s been sighing today, nor how the hell has this Thursday become a historical one. It’s worth mentioning that after they got in the car, after finding out that Jaehwan is actually a singer – a famous one apparently, Taekwoon drove both of them to his apartment, which is a very questionable decision if anyone’d ask, but a forgivable one - no one would be able to think straight anymore after going through all that. And now here they are, sitting uncomfortably on the couch of Taekwoon’s apartment, drinking, because Taekwoon decides that he needs a bit of alcohol in his system to digest this whole bizarre thing.

“I was actually surprised that you didn’t realize me, not knowing who I was”, Jaehwan speaks again, in an apologetic tone. The mischievous smile has disappeared, leaving a shy, stuttering boy behind, speaking in an almost whispering level of volume.

“I… don’t really watch TV”, or to be exact, he doesn’t remember the last time he did anything that’s unrelated to work. It’s been an infinite cycle for him, going back and forth between his house and the law firm, reading his documents, working on cases pilling up on his desk and answering phone calls, like an actual robot. That explains a lot, Taekwoon thinks, of how he didn’t have any idea who Jaehwan was.

“I was stuck in a stressful situation and was running away, turning off my phone and wandering around the city. I didn’t have any exact plan either”, Jaehwan drinks too, but seems like his tolerance is noticeably weak, because they’re just on their second round but his cheeks are starting to color to a shade of light pink, he’s talking much slower and slouches to the couch.

Taekwoon takes a minute to think back at everything, desperately trying to make some sense out of the situation. So Jaehwan is a celebrity, he was running away from his manager and schedules, bumped into Taekwoon sitting in the café, and decided to mess with him a little but didn’t expect Taekwoon to actually play along and then…?

“But how do you know my name and such?”, Taekwoon asks, and Jaehwan smiles sheepishly

“You’re actually quite famous, Mr. Jung”, he looks straight to Taekwoon eyes, and Taekwoon swallows dryly, because his black velvety eyes are brightly twinkling again, hair slightly messed up, his whole body being swallowed inside the gigantic hoodies, which makes him looks small, soft and pliant, even though he’s unexpectedly tall actually, “you’ve appeared here and there too, for being a young lawyer but with the highest winning rate of cases in the country”

“And about my blind date?”

Jaehwan laughs and it fills up the whole place, “That was a lucky guess. You looked dead bored there and impatiently checked the watch all the time so I thought you were waiting for someone”

“And that I’ve had a bad day?”

“That… was also a lucky guess!”, Jaehwan says cheerily, “it kinda showed in your expression too, Taekwoon hyung, you looked like you’d punch the first person you see when you walk out of that café”

Now it’s Taekwoon’s turn to laugh out loud, which is also one of the thing he couldn’t remember the last time he did. He guesses the alcohol is starting to get him now, because Jaehwan under the light of the poorly lit room starts to look like a beautiful illusion.

“Why did you want to go to the theme park?”

“Because I’ve never been there before”, Jaehwan pours some more wine for himself, “that’s a luxury for me, you know”

Taekwoon is half a second away from asking why, but somehow he feels like he shouldn’t. Instead, he ruffles Jaehwan’s soft hair and it’s much softer than Taekwoon expects. Jaehwan seems to be surprised by his sudden action, but he stays still anyway. Jaehwan, Jaehwan, Taekwoon thinks as his long and slender fingers combing through the younger’s faint brown hair so gently, a vibrant, lively existence, barging into his life in the most unexpected way, stubbornly had his way around him, makes him remember that he once knew how to laugh, pulls him out of his ordinary life, reminds him how his heart could also flutter; this strange feeling tying up to a knot that’s hard to swallow but at the same time spreading, blooming in his chest endearingly.

“Jaehwan”, Taekwoon calls his name, realizing that’s the first time he’s done that, because it’s always been Jaehwan talking, smiling, laughing and chirping happily besides him the whole time and he hardly said anything back, though he’s usually silent anyway, “sing for me”

Taekwoon doesn’t know where that comes from, but it surprises both of them. His heart is thumping shamelessly, tension forming and he feels red coloring across his cheeks. Jaehwan looks up again, first smiling, then laughing, still loud and echoing, but it’s empty strangely and Taekwoon tastes bitterness at the back of his throat, thinking that abrupt request could possibly make him seem like a fool. Jaehwan doesn’t say anything for quite a while, just keeps on drinking until Taekwoon decides to stop him because he’s swaying uncontrollably, eyes teary and hiccupping nonstop.

“Taekwoon hyung…”

“Taekwoon hyung….”

“Hyung…”

Jaehwan keeps saying his name, seemingly to have something he wants to say, but unable to do so. Taekwoon pulls him closer, letting him lean on his shoulder, arm about Jaehwan’s waist. The boy’s tucked closely by his side, warm and pliant, and Taekwoon finding himself falling into its gentleness quietly.

“Taekwoon hyung… do you want to know what’s the stressful situation I’m in?”

Taekwoon doesn’t reply, but he nods lightly, gesturing Jaehwan to continue.

“I started singing because I liked it, no, I loved it. Loved it so much when I could form all my feelings and thoughts and everything that is me into melodies, music notes, loved it, really loved it, I loved it, you know, hyung?”, Jaehwan’s words become an unorganized mess, “How cool is that, when you can literally _hear_ an emotion?”

Jaehwan reaches for the glass of wine on the table, pushes Taekwoon’s hand away when he tries to stop him, drinks wine in huge gulps and frowns from the aftertaste. The night deepens, blurry and weak light from the faraway street lamps gently flows into where they are, through the big glass window.

“Hyung, what if one day you wake up and you suddenly can’t do the thing you love the most anymore?”

He doesn’t reply, mostly because he doesn’t know how to, also because he’s never thought of that and he’s not even sure what’s the thing he loves the most, and might also be because right at this moment, when liquor is on the edge of getting a hold of him, he finds himself struggling for consciousness from the faintly scent of cigarette mixed with spicy cologne from Jaehwan.

“If you want to hear me sing, you’d have to watch a Youtube video then, I’m afraid, because I can’t sing anymore”

“Why?”

“I don’t know, be it the stress, the hectic schedule, the tiring life of a celebrity – which is just a fancy name for a public clown that entertains people and let them stare, point their fingers, speaking shit about, I don’t know hyung, but my voice won’t come out.”

His voice becomes lower, quieter, almost hard to hear but Taekwoon catches it anyway in complete silence. Silence, they share the next who knows how long together in silence, not entirely uncomfortable but it’s heavy like Jaehwan’s words are left hanging in the air, then sinking down with the burning sensation in their throats with the bitter liquor they drink. Taekwoon prefers silence, always finds peace within himself when darkness completely takes over and it’s so quiet he can hear his own breath or the drizzling sound of rain outside, but he realizes momentarily he hates it, because it’s unusual from Jaehwan loud self, making him look strangely sad and lost, and he really, really hates it.

“You’re fucking crazy, hyung”, Jaehwan’s starting to cuss, voice sleazy, “ditching your date, going with a complete stranger to a theme park, letting a stranger home, listening to a stranger blabbering about things that you’d never understand, asking said stranger to sing for you? Aren’t you a lawyer? Aren’t you supposed to be smart and strict and shit?”

Taekwoon doesn’t say anything back, because Jaehwan is not entirely wrong, though as crazy as it is, he doesn’t find a single trace of regret leaving behind.

“Won’t you get in trouble for running away like this later?”

“Of course, they’d kill me once they find me for sure”, Jaehwan laughs, “they will probably find me here soon, even if I run to hell they’d still be able to find me and pull me back to life, because they’re rushing me to put out an album, making up for the loss they invented in a failed girl group”

“I can put them in jail for trying to kill you, you know”, Taekwoon says that in a too serious tone that makes Jaehwan breaks out into a big laugh again, “or at least make them pay you a lifetime worth of money with an annual interest of 30% or something”

Jaehwan laughs, for real this time, his whole body pressing close and shivering besides Taekwoon, and he can feel warmth from Jaehwan’s breath spreading on the side of his neck.

“How can you say all that with a straight face? Lawyer-nim, I didn’t expect you to know how to make a joke”

“I’m not entirely joking though, are they abusing you by any means? Overworking you or shit like that, can be sued too”

“I appreciate your kindness, great wine and fucking broad shoulders that are even broader than the fucking Pacific ocean, these are the best I’ve ever leaned on daaaamnnn”, Jaehwan is so drunk and is basically spilling bullshit now, but he looks so beautiful, so beautiful, definitely in the top 3 most beautiful things Taekwoon’s ever seen in his life and he doesn’t even know what the other two are.

“And for being with me on this great escape adventure of mineeeee”, Jaehwan is acting cute again, pouting his lips and shooting finger hearts at Taekwoon.

Taekwoon frowns a little at that, but suddenly finds the girl screaming _KEN OPPAAAAAAAA_ back at the park earlier strangely relatable. He’d fall for Jaehwan too with just that watching through a screen, he thinks, but right now, right then, when Jaehwan is cuddled up by his side, mouth pressing to his neck, smiling and laughing with giggles bubbling up from his throat, he’s pretty sure he has fallen already.

Next thing he knows, he’s tasting Jaehwan’s smile on his own lips, and he’s lost in it, seeing no way out, not wanting to anyway.

.

When Taekwoon manages to sit up straight, the headache hits him hard and everything in his vision is spinning, he hates himself a bit more everytime he wakes up like this, feeling like he’s been left on a deserted island for 40 years with not even a single drop of water, throat dry and hurting like burning inside. It’s not like Taekwoon has never been drunk the night before work, but today particularly feels like all of his energy is drained out of his body. He grabs the glass of water on his night stand and gulps down the whole thing, not until when he reaches to put the glass back could he notice the small note paper. He needs a few seconds to remember back to everything, and when he realizes Jaehwan is not here anymore, he grabs the note paper almost hurriedly like Taekwoon is almost afraid that Jaehwan and everything about him was just a dream, and this note paper is the single thing he could hold onto.

_Hyungggg >_< _

_You fell asleep so I kinda had to drag you to bed, you must have been tired… sorry for tiring you out the whole day ;___;  thanks for everything, I really had fun yesterday. We’ll meet again shortly, promise <3_

_Your Jyani~_

Taekwoon grabs his phone, decides to call in sick which is the thing he has never done before, but he knows he deserves a day of lying around when he sees it reads 38 degrees on the medical thermometer and nothing similar to a call back number written anywhere on the note, and disappointment slaps him across the face.

.

Time flies? That’s a nice way to put it, because when Taekwoon takes the next breath it has already been roughly a month after that. After Jaehwan. He smiles at how ridiculous it is when Jaehwan takes a day to become a milestone in his life, existence so big it becomes life before and after Jaehwan for him. He doesn’t recall being this much of a fool or falling that fast for any of his previous lovers, not even the boy with a set of dimples and a toothy smile whose name has now become forbidden to Taekwoon, no, not even him.

Taekwoon has been busy and even though he’s always loved his job despite how chaotic it can get sometimes, he’s never been more thankful to be buried in work like he is now. It does help taking his mind off Jaehwan briefly, until one late night his mom calls in and gave him an hour of lecturing and complaining about how disappointed she was that Taekwoon didn’t show up in the blind date that she had suffered to arrange.

“You’re really stubborn, Taekwoon.”

“I’m sorry mom, some…thing came up”, _someone_

He can hear her sighing deeply through the phone, and it sinks a little in his stomach. He loves her anyway, Taekwoon hates making her sad, but this time he feels… certain about it. He doesn’t know what _it_ is, probably it’s a pair of black velvet eyes with thousands stars twinkling everytime its owner smiles.

“I… have something to tell you, mom”

His mom sighs again, and he feels heavy in his chest. Taekwoon didn’t plan to tell her anytime soon, not when she’s still hopeful enough to set him up in blind dates, desperately. It takes a few minutes of silence before she speaks again, voice unexpectedly becomes clearer in the absolute silence of the night.

“…I already knew”

“I’m sorry, mom”, Taekwoon doesn’t know is there any reason to apologize, it’s not like something he can intentionally control; he doesn’t know why he’s feeling so heavy either because his mom’s answer is not totally unexpected, but it twists slightly in his chest anyway

She doesn’t say much after that, at least nothing significantly important, before hanging up. Taekwoon is left alone solemnly, lost in his own thoughts. When he turns off the light completely and the light from street lamps weakly flows into the room, Taekwoon misses a fainted cigarette scent, warmth by his side, the sound of laughter echoing in his heart, and how it tastes on his lips.

Taekwoon wonders where Jaehwan is, what is he doing, is he okay? He said they’d meet again shortly, but didn’t leave a single trace that he was even real left. Taekwoon takes out the piece of paper he’s been keeping in his wallet, fingers wandering on childish handwriting.

_If you want to hear me sing, you’d have to watch a Youtube video then_

He reaches for his phone, surprises himself that he even forgets Jaehwan is also a singer, a celebrity, he is _his_ Jaehwan but everyone’s “Ken”, and how this will be the first time Taekwoon listens to his singing voice. His heart makes a shameless leap as the first result appears after he presses the _search_ button, is a song called **_I want to fall in love._**  

 ** _I’m so lonely, tears come into my eyes_** **** __  
My life is so fantastic but  
Loneliness comes and asks me  
Are you really happy at this moment?

In the deepest of night, droplets of sadness in Jaehwan’s voice harmonize with the gentle drizzling rain outside.

**_What is the reason for my existence?_ ** **_  
What is love? I’m so curious_ **

Love is probably this, this feeling when you’re pining, longing, chasing after a vague shadow of someone you met just once, Taekwoon lets himself sink deeper into the melody, Jaehwan’s mellow voice comforting, supposedly, just that it makes him realizes how terribly he misses its owner.

.

“Come on hyung, you deserve this”

Sang Hyuk stubbornly pulls at Taekwoon’s wrist, seemingly to have no intention to let go. Besides him there’s Hakyeon crossing his arms in front of his chest, looking at Taekwoon with that gaze of “We’re not letting you go that easy today”, and a noisy Hongbin with an even noisier Wonshik talking and arguing where they should go for the after party. Taekwoon sighs, he always tries his absolute best to avoid drinking parties that are held occasionally when they finish up a hard case, but it seems like his coworkers are not letting him go this time, he knows when Sang Hyuk is starting to use force on his grip.

“This kid…”

Sang Hyuk used to be a cute and shy younger brother when he joined them, now… well, he’s still young but no longer has that puppy aura anymore. He’s grown even taller than Taekwoon, which certainly doesn’t help at all with Taekwoon’s attempt to remain as a scary, strict and quiet senior to Sang Hyuk.

“He’s right hyung, you’re gonna be thickly covered in mould if you stay in your cave for too long”

Hongbin throws a sarcastic stare at him.

“And dust too”, Wonshik cheerfully adds

“Go with us”, Hakyeon comes closer, “It’s been forever Taekwoon. Besides, it’s not a noisy place or anything. It’s a live bar with great music, you’re gonna love it”

Taekwoon rolls his eyes. How does he even explain to Hakyeon that it’s not that he hates noisy places, noisy people, but just that he just can’t be bothered to socialize with human at all?

“Fine”, he gives in and Sang Hyuk grins happily at that, satisfyingly let go of Taekwoon’s wrist.

.

And he’s relieved that at least Hakyeon was right about the bar not being loud even when the whole place is filled, which is a pleasant surprise because a bar is the place where people’s voice are mixed with terrible, obnoxiously loud music, of being crushed between the uncomfortable warmth of bodies pressing close to others on the dance floor, and flashing light that pushes Taekwoon’s nerves to his limit, as he remembers. This place is different though, he doesn’t hear conversations being told in loud voices here and there, he doesn’t see some horny college couples crumpled up in a corner making out, and unpleasant smell of cheap alcohol – here they have some good stuffs, he must admit.

Also, these 4 guys are a pleasant bunch to hang out with. Taekwoon only has a handful of friends, and he’s lucky to have these 4 as friends and also coworkers. As he loosens up and has his third round of drinks with Sang Hyuk, Hakyeon while Wonshik and Hongbin are already arguing over some ridiculous topic, the small stage at the centre lights up.

“I heard they’re having a special guest tonight”, Sang Hyuk says before mumbles a silent “thank you” towards the bartender who’s filling up his drink

“Yeah yeah, probably a famous musician or something”, Hakyeon nods, truly seems like a regular at this place, “they do that sometimes but the guest’s identity remains a secret until the last moment”

He hears _ooohhhhs_ and _ahhhhhs_ when he’s in the middle of discussing something about the litigation procedure with his colleagues, some women whimpering softly, trying hard to keep their voices down.

 

 ** _I’m so lonely, tears come into my eyes_** **** __  
My life is so fantastic but  
Loneliness comes and asks me  
Are you really happy at this moment?

 

On stage, in a simple black button-up, hair sleek and styled neatly, eyes tightly closed, stands Jaehwa- no, _Ken._ Time freezes at that moment when he starts to sing and Taekwoon now understands what Jaehwan meant to be able to hear an emotion, because if the feeling blossoming in his chest could ring out to be melodies and notes and words, that’d be the longing, despair and grief in Jaehwan’s voice right now.

When he finishes his first song, people give him a standing ovation, including Taekwoon’s friends and it’s in all honesty well deserved. Jaehwan smiles, letting out soft and sincere “thank you” and slightly bowing in all directions, before his eyes stop at where Taekwoon is, mouthing a voiceless _“hello”_ his way.

“I hope I’m not dampening the mood here by singing sad ballads”, he says, “Good evening everyone, I’m Ken. I’m very happy to meet you here today. Very much so”

Taekwoon falls in love all over again every time Jaehwan sings, and he sing two another songs which are also ballad. Taking a look around, seeing everyone smitten and totally focused to the stage, Taekwoon realizes everyone is a little in love with Ken, the one standing on stage right now, with a beautiful voice and shining brightly, truly belongs to where all the spotlights are on him.

But Taekwoon knows a very different Jaehwan, his own Jaehwan in the giant hoodies, drinking wine in huge gulps, swaying on his seat and breathy laughs that spread warmth on his skin, eyes twinkling and curving up like crescent moon when he smiles, even the little child that screams extremely loud on scary rides at the theme park, holding onto his arm for dear life.

“And for the last song I’ll be singing today”, Jaehwan takes a gulp of water before speaking when the crowd has become quiet again, “is a new song that hasn’t been released anywhere. It’s a very special one… for a special one that I got to meet in a very… special way. And for some special reasons, that special person is here. It’s called **_Oversleep_** ”

A round of surprised _oohhhhs_ and _ahhhhs_ rings throughout the whole place again, and people start to look around as if they’d know who the special someone Jaehwan talks about is.

“What a lucky bastard”, Hongbin says, “Ken sure is a hot one”

It clutches in Taekwoon’s chest, heart beating shamelessly fast, when their eyes meet again in a brief moment.

 ** _I didn’t want to ever wake up_** **** __  
It’s only clear when I close my eyes  
I’m only focused on you  
When I look into your eyes  
I see myself, it’s the truth

**_Look at me like you did yesterday_ **

.

“Hi”

When Jaehwan knocks lightly on Taekwoon’s car window, he’s already changed off his stage outfit already and is wearing an oversized jacket covering most of his frame again. He starts laughing right the moment he sits down on the passenger seat, and it’s the cheery laughter that pulls Taekwoon back to reality.

“Where are we going, hyung?”

Jaehwan leans close, tilts his head just a little, enjoying the dazed look on Taekwoon’s face. Taekwoon’s fingers trembling on Jaehwan’s soft cheek, as if he’s holding back his breath, afraid a single slightest movement can make the beautiful illusion in front of his eyes disappear.

“This brat…”

“Why? We haven’t seen each other for a while, I expected your first word to be something romantic, Taekwoon hyung~”

He pouts a little, keen perky lips in the color of cherry blossoms jut out prettily. Taekwoon finds himself being enamored by the way Jaehwan leans to his touch, sweaty palm pressing, holding his hand.

“I really wanted to save this for later”, Jaehwan says quietly, “not in this cramped car and we’re sitting too far away like this”

Taekwoon smiles, voice equally as tender as the way he runs his fingers through the red spreading on Jaehwan’s cheek, “You think this is not close enough?”

“I just realized how terribly far this is”, he says, pulling Taekwoon closer until he can feel his breath on his skin, tip of his nose lightly touching the other’s

“Probably just like the way I realize how long a month and a week could feel like”

“You miss me”

Next thing he knows, Taekwoon is already tasting the faint mint and the tip of Jaehwan’s tongue is inviting, soft, wet and pleasant. He kisses Jaehwan like it’s the source of his life, and the way Jaehwan kisses back can’t even be describe with the word hunger. Taekwoon wants to kiss the words, the notes off Jaehwan’s pretty lips, wants to kiss the stars in his eyes, holding his slim waist tightly.

“We… really should save this for later”, Jaehwan pants lightly when they’re parted from the lack of oxygen

“My place?”

“Do you still have good wine left at home?”

“I’m already drunk even before taking the first glass, I don’t have that much of patience”

Jaehwan laughs out loud, “wow, this is just the second time we meet and we’re already on the edge of risky, kinky car sex”

“Shut up”

.

“It doesn’t even feel real”, was what Jaehwan told him after, in between kisses and sweats on dampening skin, right at the moment desire swallows them whole.

Taekwoon, too, thinks it’s just a beautiful dream and Jaehwan is both the ghost haunting it and the sweetest nightmare he doesn’t want to wake up from, but sometimes the dreams that come true are the ones you never even know you have, so all and all is well and he knows just that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ahhh... i really had fun writing this, even though it turns out to be a crappy piece as usual ;x; thanks for reading if you've made it to this ending note, comments are greatly appreciated so please do leave them if you feel like x


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